Your gut doesn't know shit
I'll explain...
I hear it a lot “listen to your gut” and I get it! It’s a real thing, we can and should listen to our gut. A lot of my work as a therapist and supervisor involves listening to my gut.
But for the love of god let us remember:
Your gut doesn't know shit when you don’t feel safe.
How can you listen to your gut when you are full of anxiety?
How can you listen to your gut when you can’t get of the toilet.
How can you listen to your gut when your head is screaming.
If you are not okay, your gut is not okay, and it isn’t going to be the best advice giver. It might be saying run, when the best thing to do is stay. It might be saying stay when all you should do is run. In those times, I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need to listen to the advice of your closest friends and family (not strangers on the internet like me) … except this advice - this is pretty good.
Also, what about other bodily instincts?
One of my go to things to consider with clients is listening to our Head, Heart, Gut.
Our head represents logic. Our head will tell us the “smart” thing to do.
Our heart represents the feeling. Our heart will tell us, well, what our heart desires.
Our gut represent instincts. Our gut will give us an idea of what instinctively feels right.
What’s even better is if you can get two - or more - of those to agree. If your gut says no but your head and heart say yes - what’s that saying? If you gut and heart say yes, but your head says no - what’s going on? Communicate with yourself. Communicate with your body.
And remember again head, heart, gut - they only work well when you are well. Your head knows no logic with a headache or hangover. Your heart is confused when it’s pattering away anxious or dealing with heartbreak and your gut doesn’t know shit - when you can’t stop shitting.
So next time someone says “what does your gut say” ask yourself first, how am I? Am I fed, rested, watered, calm. Have I been in nature, spoken to friends and laughed recently? Is my nervous-system okay?
Ask yourself what your head is saying too, and listen to that emotive heart of yours. Provided they are both rested too.
Hey, if you’re a therapist or mental health practitioner did you know I have another substack all about clinical supervision? Check out this months post:
Supervision with Tom
Thank you for reading today’s essay, happy Friday,
Tom